Divorce, though increasingly common, can still be extremely unsettling, even devastating. But it can also make you wiser.
Staying in a toxic and tense marriage isn’t beneficial for anyone, and sometimes, no matter how hard you try, you just can’t make it work. Divorcing could be the healthiest option.
40 Things Only Divorced People Know
1. It takes Two
If only one of you wanted to save the marriage, the situation would become impossible for both parties, and it has to end.
2. It’s Never Easy
Divorce is always difficult, whether emotionally, financially, or practically.
3. You Need Your Friends
There’s nothing like divorce to make you feel alone. This is where outstanding friendship becomes invaluable.
4. Stop Judging
Having gone through a divorce, you realize that it’s best not to pass judgment on other people’s relationships.
5. Sometimes You Can’t Stay
If a marriage has become extremely toxic, there comes a point where you realize that there is no sense in staying.
6. Part Ways Amicably
This isn’t always possible, but when it is, it makes life much more pleasant. It could also help resolve financial or custody battles.
7. Sometimes You Feel Strangely Happy
Whether you feel a new sense of freedom or are just glad you are no longer constantly arguing, there are moments of true happiness.
8. Mornings Can Be Tough
Sleeping alone again takes some getting used to. However, this feeling fades over time.
9. Social Engagements Induce Anxiety
If you have mutual friends with your ex, you might be worried about the atmosphere or, worse still, that your ex could be there.
10. It’s Complicated…
Divorce can be sad, exhausting, lonely, exciting, and scary, all at once. Nobody planned for it to happen.
11. Communication is Key
Divorced people often realize that maintaining a blissful and healthy marriage requires continuous communication.
12. No Two Divorces are the Same
Just like every marriage is different, so is every divorce. Some people grieve the collapse of their marriage, while others sweep their feelings under the rug.
13. There is a Thin Line Between Love and Hate
You can’t really hate someone unless you love them first. A particularly unpleasant divorce can exacerbate this situation significantly.
14. It’s Better to be Single Sometimes
It’s undoubtedly better to be single than stuck with the wrong person for life.
15. It’s Painful to See Your Spouse Leave
Even if you know it’s the right thing to do, when the moment comes, it’s challenging not to feel very upset, lost, and confused.
16. It Gets Better
Time certainly can and will heal the wounds. It will get better eventually, but the process takes time.
17. Parenting Can Become More Tiring
If you have children, you will feel the extra burden of caring for them separately, and you may have to deal with their reactions to the divorce.
18. You Can Be Paranoid
You may feel like people are whispering about your divorce. More often than not, it’s just paranoia, but others may indeed discuss your relationship.
19. Small Things Have More Meaning
Physical objects, memories of places, or even routines can bring back associations with your marriage, throwing you off-guard.
20. You Will Fall in Love Again
It may take a while, and you’ll have to be ready for it, but love exists in many shapes and forms, just waiting for you to notice.
21. It’s Hard to Tell the Children
Whatever age they are, it will never be simple for the children. The effect it can have on them can also be significant.
22. Marrying Again Isn’t Necessary
You don’t have to marry someone just because you fall in love with them and commit to them exclusively.
23. You Are Responsible for Your Own Happiness
You cannot rely on someone else to make you happy. Happiness comes from within.
24. You See the Worst of Your Ex
You may see your former spouse in a very different light when the walls finally come crashing down. This could help you get over them faster.
25. Losing the Pet May be Devastating or a Relief
Depending on how you felt about the household pet, you might be happy to see its back or heartbroken.
26. Trust Your Instincts
Moving forward from your divorce can take time, but you should look out for the same red flags that destroyed your marriage.
27. It’s Strange Telling Your Parents
Your parents should support you, but you may inevitably feel like a child again when you tell them the news.
28. You Need to Support Yourself
This applies to financial, emotional, and practical matters. It is critical to move forward as an independent person.
29. New Relationships Feel Strange at First
It will always feel strange to get involved with someone else when you thought your whole future was mapped out with your ex. But, you’ll get used to it eventually.
30. Starting Over Can Be Scary
While it can be scary to start over, it can also be exciting. Always remember that life goes on.
New Insights from Divorced Individuals
31. You Learn to Redefine Family
After divorce, family dynamics shift, and you learn to create a new sense of family that might include close friends or even a blended family with new partners and their children.
32. Financial Independence is Empowering
Many divorced people learn the benefits of managing their own finances and becoming financially independent.
33. Your Health Can Improve
Leaving a stressful marriage can lead to better physical and mental health. Many find they have more time and energy to focus on self-care.
34. Rediscovering Personal Interests
Divorce can offer the chance to rekindle interests and hobbies that the marriage may have neglected.
35. Developing New Skills
From cooking to home repairs, many divorced people find themselves developing new skills out of necessity, which can be both empowering and rewarding.
36. Building a Support Network
Beyond friends and family, divorced individuals often find comfort and support in groups specifically for divorced people, both online and in person.
37. Travel Can Be Therapeutic
Many find that traveling, whether alone or with friends, can be a beneficial way to heal and gain new perspectives on life.
38. Celebrating Small Wins
Divorce teaches you to appreciate the small victories, whether it’s mastering a new skill or simply getting through a tough day.
39. Setting Boundaries
Divorce often necessitates learning to set healthy boundaries, not just with an ex but in all areas of life.
40. Valuing Self-Reflection
The process of divorce encourages deep self-reflection, leading to personal growth and a better understanding of what one truly wants in life.
Divorce is undoubtedly challenging, but it also brings wisdom and opportunities for personal growth. Those who have been through it come out on the other side with unique insights and a renewed sense of self.
